Fear

Fear....The very word makes my stomach clench. When I was a little girl I did not know the name for fear. Growing up taught me its meaning very well.

Lit Cigarettes and Black Pick up trucks are two of my fears. Why ? Well both of them are things that in the course of my life have hurt me and caused me pain.

First the cigarettes. When I was little I would often forget to look where I was going. I would somehow manage to walk right into the path of a lit cigarette. I usually got burned either on the arm or hand. I still remember how that felt.

Fearing Black trucks is much harder to explain. Here goes, A man I thought I loved very much drove one. We shared some really good times together. I learned a lot during our relationship. I don't regret it at all anymore.

I loved seeing him pull his truck into my driveway. I never dreamed that things would ever change for us. Neither of us could have known that it would all end.

Honestly, most of the time trucks don't bother me. Then with no warning my fear will emerge. I don't think he is dangerous. Nothing ever happened between us to cause me to think otherwise. This fear has no rational cause. It is ...what it is.

Fears can be obvious like the cigarette, or unexplainable like the trucks. It doesn't matter if it makes sense or not. Fear should never be ignored.

Intuition is fears buddy. That little voice in your head that tells you to beware of danger is called intuition. The warnings sometimes don't make any sense. In fact quite a few will never , ever make sense. But they all have a reason.

Life is not a kind teacher. The lessons are hard and unavoidable no matter what.
All we can do is take the best that life offers and learn to leave the rest.

** Ever Forward **